Thursday, June 25, 2009

I sat myself down for a talk.

On June 19th I posted about my meeting with a behaviorist to address some of my eating issues and anxiety. At that time, I don't think I could completely fathom the power of the use of positive words.

Today, I realized that I have begun to have conversations with myself when I desire to eat something. I ask myself if I am really hungry? Do I truly need this? If yes, then why do I think I need this? Is it a good choice for my goals? That last question is a big one for me. "Is it a good choice for my goals?" This question is usually followed by me listing the goals I have for my future that are so important to me. My future goals of losing weight so that I regain my health, so that I can have my hips replaced enabling me to walk normally, and ultimately enabling me to get back to being a productive and independent person.

I think the reason that this conversation that I am having is so powerful for me is that the desire to eat something is just an impulse, but previously, I never considered the long term consequences that yielding to that impulse would have on what I ultimately want for my future.

I have been following up these questions and answers with the "I Choose" statement. Whatever my decision is, to eat or not to, I choose it. I take responsibility for it, instead of feeling like it has power over me. This has been amazingly effective and freeing for me so far. I have noticed that I don't feel deprived when I choose not to eat, nor do I feel guilt when I decide to eat. Moreover, when I do choose to eat, it seems to take less to be satisfied. Wow!

I am curious to see how these conversations with myself will evolve over time. How will my next meeting with the behaviorist build upon this? Only time will tell.


NotAMeanGirl said...

Awesome! Talking yourself through and out of that sort of thing is VERY difficult. You have to be SUPER self-aware to do it and have it work! Good for you!!!!

Ida said...

I think many people would be better off if they realized they held responsibility for the choice s they make.